The Controversial Good Boy Gone Bad

*My Cyber Column is updated!*

It happened in Bukit Mertajam, my friend named James (name has to be modified) went out for a tea-session with 2 friends at almost 12 midnight, so when they were about to get into the car, a Chinese dude in his 40’s approached them and said he wanna negotiate with James in the car. Natural instinct? “HELL NO” to his face! Who would be so stupid to allow a stranger to get into your car for no apparent reason?

Then this man started with his threats, saying that he has his friends waiting in the restaurant so if my friend does not want to comply to his requests, he would be dead. So James ignored him. Sensing that “my-friends-are-waiting-in-the-restaurant” trick is not working, that moron shot his second threat.

This time, he said, “I have a bottle of acid with me.“. Now James started to get a little freaked out, what if what if his face just melt like that?! So what he did was he allowed this man to get into his car and start off with his so called “negotiation”. And upon a long conversation, this man just wants MONEY, poor drug-addict-professional-robber-wannabe.

James and his friends told him that they don’t have much money, so they could only give him RM30. This man was not contented, he even requested that James must drive him to somewhere and drop him. WHERE ARE HIS RESTAURANT FRIENDS???

So James drove him to somewhere quite remote and as James wanted to “pay” him, he saw that James has a lot of RM50 notes. This time, the “professional” robber said that he wants all the money, or else James will be whacked because he knows a lot of Notorious gangsters, he even mentioned a name of a notorious gangster who is already dead. So this professional robber can also summon dead souls - Necromancer?

I did mention James and his 2 friends right, they got really pissed off and one of them took out his screw driver and pointed it at the robber’s back, and this robber took out his “acid” bottle. Tada~ King Of Fighters vs Street Fighters!!!

*SMASH*

The acid bottle was broken by James’ friend, the acid leaks of course… AND NOBODY GETS INJURED BECAUSE IT’S A FREAKING H2O - WATER!!! NOT ANY ACIDIC SOLUTIONS. Damn it, James’ friend got even pissed off and kicked him off the car. And there you go, a fallen professional robber wannabe.

First of all, ladies and gentlemen, yes, I am trying to compliment James’ friend for being damn brave to give him a flying kick. And secondly, damn you stupid James, you could have whacked him instead of giving him a free ride, your dad is right, 3 of you should have given him a nice “massage”!!!

And thirdly,

You might not be as lucky as James to have brave friends when you’re out at night, and as we all know, shit happens all the time. At any point of time we could be the target of robbery, what to do? People are getting poorer and if there’s any chance of getting free cash to feed themselves, WHY NOT?
People may approach you and tell you that they know which which gangster, they carry deadly weapons blah blah blah… But I’m sure there’s something we can do to prevent ourselves from getting into this trouble right?

If possible,

• Don’t try to go out alone at night

• Bring your friends along, but after dropping them, you’re alone again, so might as well don’t go out at night

• Learn martial arts, but if the robber points a gun/knife at you, better surrender

• Go for singing classes so that you can practice high pitch and whatever happens - SCREAM!!!

• Don’t show off your camera phones, your blings blings, your ching ching your whatever that makes people feel like snatching.

Still, better be safe than sorry, don’t go out at night, if you can’t sleep, get online, surf some blogs, write blogs, chit chat with some vampire friends. Just try not to lose your personal belongings to some desperate assholes.

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